Mommy, I HATE oatmeal.

I have two kids. One loves almost everything I cook, even experiments that come out looking odd, lightly burned food and new foods he's never seen before. If he was my only child, I would think that feeding kids is easy, fun, simple and satisfying.

But I don't think that. Because I have another child. She keeps me very, very humble. She grumbles, she cries, she refuses food, she begs for junk food at the store. And, worst of all, she has a habit of suddenly proclaiming that she now hates foods that she used to like.

Just yesterday, she walked into the kitchen, dressed in wildly mismatched clothes, and ready for a tough day in 1st grade. She glared at the saucepan bubbling on the stove.

"I hope that's not oatmeal because you know that I hate oatmeal now."

I said the stupidest thing possible, having not had any coffee yet: "You don't hate oatmeal!"

"I do," she sighed, shaking her head at my lack of maternal mind-reading skills, "but don't worry about it. I'll make myself an English Muffin."

For just a moment, I stopped packing lunches/making coffee/feeding the cat/unloading the dishwasher. I thought to myself about the section in Feeding the Kids on not making separate meals for kids. I though about how hard it is on kids (and parents) when they let kids decide what to eat and then the kid's diet becomes restricted.

But then I thought about her going to 1st grade hungry, about the crying fit she'd have if I gave her oatmeal, about how a whole-wheat English muffin is healthy after all. I opened my mouth to say go ahead and make the muffin. Then I closed it and took a deep breath.

"I'm sorry you don't like oatmeal anymore. But that's what we are having. You don't have to eat it, of course, but it just doesn't work to have everyone having different things for breakfast."

She cried. She pleaded. She used the "I'll starve" technique. She stormed out of the kitchen. I felt terrible. I doubted myself. Was she really going to skip breakfast before school?

But then, to my relief and amazement, my daughter trudged--frowning-- back to the kitchen. She added huge amounts of milk, walnuts and dried fruit to her bowl of oatmeal. She topped it off with some brown sugar.

And then she ate the oatmeal. And the next day? Well, we all had English Muffins.

Yikes! The Doctor Says No Dairy for My Daughter

If you've read Feeding the Kids, you know my take on dairy foods for children. I agree with those who claim that dairy isn't vital to survival: your children could get their calcium from beans, greens, almonds, tofu, salmon with bones, and/or calcium supplements/fortified foods. However, for kids without dairy intolerances and allergies, lower-fat dairy foods provide both calcium and protein in an easy, healthy and kid-friendly package. Also, for those people worried about pesticides and hormones in milk, organic or hormone-free milk is now widely available.
That's why, usually, my kids get three servings of dairy each day. It's the easiest and most natural way for me to insure that they get the calcium they need.

Until this week, that is. One of my kids has been feeling sick for a couple of weeks. So, the doctor told me to avoid all dairy foods for her for at least a week. She explained that dairy foods are hard to digest when you are feeling sick and eating them might not start the problems... but diary foods can keep them going. So, we stopped all dairy. Like magic, her problems cleared up. Mine, however, had just started.

It's really hard to avoid dairy foods! So many kid-foods have dairy: pasta with Parmesan cheese, pizza, pudding, pancakes...the list goes on. So, I enlisted some "expert" help from a 14 year old expert who hasn't had dairy in over a year--and her mom! Here are her top 8 suggestions if one of your kids ever has to avoid dairy foods.

1. Eat greens, canned salmon, almonds and tofu for calcium. Or try calcium supplements as recommended by the doctor. Beware of giving a child lots of calcium-enriched orange juice, though. You don't want them to fill up on juice and not want other foods.
2. Serve lean meats to add in extra protein. Skinless white poultry, extra-lean hamburgers, and pork loin are a few great choices.
3. Beans are also a great replacement for the protein and some of the calcium. Hummus, baked beans, and chili are good ways to incorporate beans.
   
4. Earth Balance brand spread makes a good replacement for butter in recipes and for toast.
5. Rice milk (plain not vanilla) works in many recipes (but see #6 below)--soy milk has a stronger flavor that many kids don't like if they aren't used to it.
6. Non-dairy baked goods, such as muffins, pancakes or quick breads, can be tricky. Substituting rice or soy milk for regular milk often results in odd textures or strange flavors. You are better off finding non-dairy recipes on the internet or in cookbooks.
   
7. Don't bother with non-dairy cheese. Most of it tastes (and I quote) "funny."
   
8. For treats, many brands of non-dairy ice cream and pudding tastes great. However, even soy and rice ice cream sometimes contains whey--so read the ingredients if you are avoiding all dairy foods!

Why Do You Always Have Vegetables in Your Lunch?

That's what a kid at school asked my son the other day. He answered "Cause I like them!"

Then, after practicing at home, he went up the little heckler the next day, looked him in the eye, and said "From now on, don't say anything about my lunch."

It worked. But, still. So far this year, my kids have been teased for vegetables, avocado on a sandwich, cheese (!), salad and even yogurt. They don't really seem to care that much. But isn't it amazing that our little kids are so convinced that real food is weird when brightly colored, nutritionally-depleted, chemical-tasting food is normal.

It's just something to think about.

Berry Picking with Kids

Day before yesterday, my family did one of our favorite activities. We went to "The Farm." That's what we call Berry Patch Farms in Brighton, Colorado, a you-pick place with strawberries, raspberries and all kinds of vegetables. It's the kind of place where there really is a red barn, roasters crow and they take you out to the berry picking patch on a tractor pulled wagon traveling through fields of broccoli, spinach, squash and sunflowers. It's so idyllic that I always feel like I am exaggerating when I describe it.

When we are there together, the world makes sense. Even my six-year-old can feel it--in fact I think she, especially, feels it. And I am trying to put my finger on why. Here's what I do know: Picking food is an instinctively satisfying experience, something humans are meant to do, but few Americans have the opportunity to do. And working together as a family to get food for the winter allows the children to participate in an adult activity, rather than common modern construct of adults participating in children's activities. Last, there is the insanely wonderful, incredibly flavorful food. But as dramatic as I am being...the sum is still more than the exact parts that I can list.

All I can say is: yeah for berry picking!

And, by the way, yesterday I packed fresh raspberries and tiny fresh carrots from the farm in the kid's lunches. Nobody teased them--and when I asked my son about them, his eyes got big and he just said "Oh, man, they tasted great!"

Healthy Packed Lunches and Teasing in the Lunchroom

Today was the first day of school for my kids. I cried. I always cry the first day they go back. But this year, I didn't cry in front of them. They were nervous and excited--but they didn't cry because they, unlike their mom, are very grown-up.

So, early this morning, I snipped the tags off the new lunch boxes and peered inside. Empty. Could fill them with something that showed the kids how much I love them...something that says I'm thinking of them when they aren't here? Could I make this lunch stand in for me since I can't be there? Hum, I'd need a curly haired, somewhat neurotic lunch with a tendency toward disorganization. Nothing in the kitchen, besides myself, would work. And I can't fit into the lunch box, even if I use the secret-hidden-zipper that expands the lunch box to almost suitcase size.

I had to settle for packing a healthy lunch instead. But healthy isn't good enough either- the lunch must also not invite teasing from fellow students. Last year, some kids teased my son for having hummus. He said the teasers were eating junk food and he briefly considered telling them about the trans fat and piles of sugar they were eating. But, in the end, he just shrugged, told them they were "stupid," and went back to eating his hummus. Apparently, calling them "stupid" worked, as it so often does, and that was the end of it. Even though I usually discourage name calling, I was glad he stood up for himself--and his healthy lunch.

But this year, he's more self-conscious and he's going to a new school. And my daughter definitely cares if other's make fun of her for anything at all, lunch included. Of course, all kids have to learn to ignore other people's opinions sometimes and find ways to handle teasing. But I hate the think that the lunches I pack would cause them to suffer in any way.

And so I packed crackers (whole-wheat), cheese (2% cheddar), squares of turkey meat, some grapes and some orange pepper sticks (the most risky addition). I added a few kalamata olives for a treat--they're small and I think the kids can eat them without attracting unwelcome attention. After the first few weeks of school go by, and the kids have more friends at their new school, I'll talk to them about adding some of their favorite "strange" items, like salmon salad or smoothie ice cream. Who knows? Maybe we'll even go for hummus again...

Yogurts with Fiber...Watch out!

The other day my kids and I had smoothies while staying with relatives. Later in the day, we were all in terrible pain with horrible stomach aches. I asked if I could peek at the yogurt she'd used in the smoothie. And, sure enough, it was Stonyfield Farms brand yogurt.

About a year ago, my whole family started suffering from terrible tummy aches several days a week. I couldn't figure out what was happening. We weren't sick or eating any strange foods. It didn't occur to me that yogurt could cause these problems--yogurt is good for tummy aches, after all. But, one day we happened to have nothing but big bowls of yogurt for a snack and were in pain a couple hours later. So, I checked the label and saw, to my surprise, that the yogurt contained fiber.

So, I called the Stonyfield Farms consumer info line. The fiber in their yogurt comes from something called "inulin" which is listed on the ingredients list. It's made from chicory root fibers and is added for the fiber, and fiber increases calcium absorption among other healthy benefits. The inulin is also a "prebiotic" food for the yogurt cultures, though it's very possible to make yogurt with non-fibrous prebiotics. The person I talked to wouldn't comment on the stomach-ache issue.

But Stonyfield is not alone. Other brands are jumping on the fiber bandwagon. For example, Horizon brand organic yogurt contains something called "NutraFlora®" which also seems to cause tummy aches in kids. It's benefits are similar to the inulin, but I couldn't find out what it's made out of...that's proprietary!

I get that most people need more fiber in their diets. But, I'd bet that most people who eat organic nonfat yogurts are the types of healthy-conscious people who get plenty of fiber from fruits, veggies, whole grains and nuts. These artificial fiber additions to yogurt are totally unnecessary for a healthy diet!

Of course, these fibrous yogurts may not bother everyone. But, if you or your family members are suffering from mysterious stomach aches... take a look at your yogurt.

Healthy Snow Cones!

While on vacation, my always-on-top-of-the-trends niece brought her snow-cone maker. Turns out, snow cones are all the rage this summer for the older elementary set.

Needless to say, my kids were smitten with the icy concoctions. So, after we got home, we bought ourselves a $15 snow cone maker. Standing there in Target, the kids and I had visions all the snow cones we'd make. We'd impress their friends. We'd cool ourselves after bike rides in the summer sun. We'd use all the ice that our lame ice maker could generate. But then we turned to the syrup selection and our happy imaginings came to an abrupt halt.

I could not buy the brightly colored, artificially flavored corn-syrup called "Snow Cone Syrup."

"Kids," I told them, "We'll invent our our syrup. It won't be easy-- it will involve a lot of ice, a dose of creativity and the courage to taste."

They nodded. And we set to work. Here are the results of weeks of study:

• Orange juice: Not too good. Too bland and the pulp gets caught on the ice. Plus, the color is unappealing.
• Fresh squeezed lemon or lime with honey: Delicious, but too much work. The bottles lemon and lime juice tasted funny.
  
• Olive juice: I refused to taste this one. The kids claim it was good, but then again they didn't actually eat much of it between hysterical bouts of laughter.
• Juicy juice: So-so, but not very great.
• Limeade concentrate, melted: Really good, but not very healthy. (Though better than the Snow Cone syrup.)
• And finally, the winner: 100% fruit juice concentrate, melted: Fantastically good! We used cranberry-raspberry juice blend. But there's lots of flavors. You can keep the can of concentrate in the frig, ready to go. The juice plus the ice is basically the equivalent of a cup of juice. Not as healthy as a piece of real fruit of course, but still fairly healthy.

Hurray for snow cones.